Making resolutions is fun to me; it's a personality hazard! But like many, I love a new year full of possibility for positive change. When I was young we had a tradition of making resolutions together as a family. My dad kept a folder of our yearly goals and we'd reread them each year. My siblings and I would make "resolution booths" out of couch cushions and pillows and set our sights high: quit wetting the bed, stop biting nails, learn to read, etc. As we aged, our resolutions continued to be age-appropriate: read more or specific books, organize something, get better grades, etc. I love these memories!
Last year, the Lord guided me in a new direction, planting the idea of a 'theme word' for the year, one I could focus on and watch Him use to transform me. For much of last year, I wrote about being OPEN regularly, to keep myself accountable to that God-given word. As 2015 was drawing to a close, another word kept coming up enough that it occurred to me that I should maybe pay attention: SURRENDER.
Truth be told, I find this word terrifying. When I think of surrendering I think of having to let go and give up on things I hold dear, whether or not they are good for me or honor God. I visualize myself clinging tightly to idols that might as well be golden calves, for as they are just as deaf, mute, and useless as idols made of stone and metal. I picture SURRENDER looking like un-clinging to those idols and clinging instead to our Savior.
Well, I wrote the previous three paragraphs a couple of weeks ago. Looks like I didn't make a very strong blogging resolution for the year! The last week has been quite interesting, though. Here I am fearing having to SURRENDER because I love myself and my golden calves so much, and God has been driving home to me that He is merciful, loving, and kind. I cannot get through a day without being overwhelmed by His never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love, to borrow a phrase from The Jesus Storybook Bible.
God is killing me with kindness!
And I'm finding His kindness is unlike any other. From stories of His chosen people and their deceitful, dishonest, and impure ways I have been reading in my study times, to the quiet whispers of the Spirit to my soul that say, Heather, you really are forgiven. God truly loves you as His child, I have been floored daily by this incredible God who owes me nothing but gives me everything, even Himself.
Of course, as a Christian I know that God is love and all that jazz, but it has been humbling and heart-freeing to be the object of His direct and consistent instruction from His word and Spirit that HE LOVES ME.
The Truth makes me want to live differently,
with my family, my friends, at the grocery store -
a joyful surrender in response to His love.
a joyful surrender in response to His love.
I'm convicted, but hopeful, because if God loves and forgives me, surely He can transform me. I won't be forever bound by my chains of addition to praise, fear of failure, the prideful need to be the best, the constant need to compare, quick anger and frustration. My Father loves me. It is well with my soul. Every day I can repent and believe the good news!
I have several stories to share about how Scripture reading has been piercing my heart and uplifting it. I will do my best to share them over the next few weeks, because friends, God's word is the best fuel for our faith. Watching the Lord "in action" with His people throughout history, reading about Him walking the streets of Earth, and meditating on the praise of the Psalms and wisdom of the Proverbs changes the way we think and sparks our spirit to life. New life!
Dear reader, are you exposing yourself to and availing yourself of the Word of God more than on Sunday mornings? You don't need an over-the-top plan or resolution, simply a commitment to crack the book or the app open and take in something. If you need ideas, I'd be happy to help you come up with something. I am confident, because of God's never stopping, never giving up, unbreaking, always and forever love, that regular meditation on the Word will make 2016 a different year for all us!
Finally, if you have a theme word for the year, I'd love to hear about it!
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